Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Be Okay

I sat down the other day to write thank you cards to all of the people who made my 
life so much easier and who have carried me over the past five weeks.
Those who buoyed me up as the world felt muted to me, like living underwater.


There are too many of you.  I could never, never, never, find enough cards at Target
to adequately thank everyone.
I had prayers, cards, Facebook wishes, GDT wishes, more prayers, flowers, lesson planners, hugs, calls, emails, texts, photos, visitors, movers, shakers, meals, cleaners, 
movers (oh, I said that already!), 
travelers, packages, books, daffodils delivered in a snowstorm, more phone calls, 
and more phone calls,
more hugs, and more tears shed with me than I can count.

You all knew what my family and I needed before we knew what we needed.

These blessings came from all over the world:
Canada, Sri Lanka, Australia, France, Richfield, 
NYC, Colorado, Utah, and every state in between.

To all of you...
I thank you. 
It's as simple as that and as deeply, deeply felt as my broken heart can feel.

As I mentioned earlier, 
you all carried me and continue to do so as I deal with the
grief of losing my best friend, my love, my boyfriend,
my Terry.

I have several "go to" songs that help me through the day.
(One Celestial and one a bit more Telestial...maybe even outerdarkness-like)

This one by Ingrid Michaelson is my current mantra.
I listen to it every morning...especially now, often four or five times in the car, or on the way to school.

After seeing the video,
I love it even more and feel exactly as she does as
those who love her, carry her...
like you all did for me.

I love you.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Found One More (maybe Two)

One more!  I will always remember this day!  Thanks to Melissa for lending us your twins!

Then, sweet Erika posted this last night/this morning!  It's all true.  Terry DID set a timer whenever Eloise came over so that we had equal time with her!!!

Friday, March 16, 2012

Found These...

This morning (2 am) I was browsing through my past posts on this blog.  I started finding several posts about my boyfriend/husband, Terry.  At first, it made me cry.  Then, the more I found and read, I found myself smiling and even laughing a little about all the great memories I have of him.

So, I gathered most of them here, in one place, so that I can find them quickly and smile again when I'm missing him so much that I can barely breathe.

I wrote this about my boyfriend back in 2008 when I was writing my "series" of the people I "like" which sometimes is even a little deeper than "love".

And this one that is just a sweet story.

A birthday post.

A Father's Day post.

Why he'd make a great babysitter!

Why I will ALWAYS adore sunflowers.

His one and only modeling job.

His sweet-tooth...have you ever seen Elf??

Harry Potter and the costumes (yes) we both were tricked into wearing!

"Creative" home repairs.

Oh, I miss him.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

I Still Have No Words...

Tonight I am extremely sad.  I have nothing to say yet. but am sooo proud of those children who do.  
If you care to read some beautiful posts about my boyfriend, Terry...here you go:

Erin (Daughter/Friend/sister-from-a-different-mother, and one of my best friends) wrote about the shock we all felt as we found out about our Terry.

Erika (Daughter) Wrote a very poised post the very evening of her daddy's death.  I am amazed at her words.

Melissa 2 (Daughter.  We have two Melissa's...this one is born of my loins an adopted by Terry) wrote the most amazingly, tender, letter to her papa that makes me cry each and eveytime I read the piece.

Then, there's Abbie.  Terry's youngest daughter...There are actually others as well as you look around.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               

Thanks to these lovelies, I can have a little more time before I can actually write.  And, write I will...just not right now.  I'm just still very sad.

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